The Spanish Plume - A Steve Rant

For audio click here

Steve and Johnny watched the rain clatter onto the street outside the pub. It was sweeping in in bursts on the wind, each one heavier than the last, this latest one biblical in proportions. A woman tried to walked against the wind, her umbrella being used as a shield as she battered against the elements.
“Looks like we're swimming home,” Johnny said.
“Aye,” Steve agreed. “Or hailing an ark” They both took a swig of their beer.

“Some Spanish plume this is.”
“Spanish what? Are you speaking English.” Johnny said.
“Didn't you see it in the press? They were saying that the weather forecasters were predicting a Spanish plume was on the way. Some weather system bringing the Spanish weather with it. They were threatening temperatures in the mid-thirties for two weeks.”
“I must have missed that.” Johnny said
“How do those weather forecasters get it so wrong? It is more like Siberia than Sevilla.”

“Well it’s not an exact science is it?” Johnny was trying to be reasonable. “There are so many variables.”
“So why do they put out such sweeping statements then in that case. They’ve only got one job and they seem to fuck it up.” 

“It’s probably the press misinterpreting. The weather forecasters probably say there’s a possibility of a Spanish whatsit and then the press take it as fact. Anyway what do you care? You hate hot weather. Surely it's a relief that the Spanish plume drifted off elsewhere.” Johnny took another swig of his beer.
“Well yes it is, but that doesn't compensate does it. I should sue.”

“Sue who? For what?” Johny looked askance.

“Sue them for the days of worry that this thing might be coming. For the planning I did on how to cope in that kind of temperatures. Don't you think these people should be accountable for misinformation?” Steve banged the table with his finger. “Half the population were running to Boots to buy suntan lotion, while the other half were running to buy air conditioners. Shops were stocking up on ice cream and cold drinks, when actually we all should have been buying shares in umbrella manufacturers.”

“The press lie about everything, Steve, ” Johnny said. “Why worry about this?”

“Why worry about anything?” Steve said and got up to go to the bar.

“Well quite,” murmured Johnny, “quite.”

div class="smashwords-widget" data-bgcolor="#fafafa" data-buttoncolor="#ffc801" data-font="sans" data-headline="Maggie’s Milkman" data-height="150" data-items="book:412845" data-ribboncolor="#4181c3" data-type="single" data-width="180" style="height: 150px; width: 180px;">